Aug 25, 2009

dans le garbage

A few days ago, the apartment downstairs was rented out. It's the one right across from the French lesbian. I caught a glimpse of the new neighbor, and, well, she looks like she might be another one.
It's hard to tell.
She is French. Of that much I'm sure.
And very tan.
Later that night, while throwing out my trash, I came upon a little treasure trove of hers. Jackpot! Among the items I stole retrieved were the following:

1. one clock radio, slightly smeared with lipstick.2. Two perfect, unused tubes of French depilatory cream, or is that crème?

3. Ten French books, including the intriguingly English titled, Back Street.

What's her deal? (uh...qu'est-ce c'est la dealieaux?)

Anyway, that's what I'm wondering.


ayem8y said...


You let one in and the rest follow and ruin the neighborhood. What no dental dams? Backstreet sounds good can you read French? Can you translate French for us? I’m dying for synopsis.

Score on the clock radio though. Does it display in French?

jason said...

Dental dams? I believe that's what the clock radio is for, hence the lipstick.

Muscato said...

Back Street? Score! Only one of Fannie Hurst's best-known novels, source for three film versions - Irene Dunne, Margaret Sullavan, Susan Hayward - of steadily increasing trashiness (the male lead having devolved from Charles Boyer to John Gavin, which should tell you all you need to know).

And in such a fab pulp cover, too. That one's a keeper. The crème? Maybe not so much.

mrpeenee said...

So she sucks on her radio OCCASIONALLY. Are you saying you never have?

Elizabeth said...

Silly Jason! She broke up with her girlfriend and, not wanting to give her the time of day, threw out the clock radio, but not before kissing it adieu. She no longer needs to clear the brush, as it were, thus the Veet went away vite. And she no longer wants to read Anglais, and she wishes her ex was "en efer."

mystery solved. The end.

(God I LOVE going through other peoples trash! It's like archaeology, only not with old stuff!)

MJ said...



Anonymous said...

Perhaps she gave up on being a lipstick lesbian.

Her future will be about mechanics instead of trashy literature. She will cure that ugly rash veet products gave her and let her bush grow free.

The lipstick marks on the radio are quite easy to explain but it would be a too graphic explanation...

Now, this would be her conversation at the telephone the day you perused her garbage:

«Vous savez Maman, les Américains sont trés bizarre. Hier j'ai vu le péde qu'habite a cotê a porter des choses de mon poubelle....»

Jill said...

Ok...I don't know what a dental dam is. I have an idea. I'm off to google it now. I'm embarrassed by my ignorance.

Michael Guy said...

"French Lesbian" sounds like a paint color I might be interested in.

Ish?! lipstick on a clock radio?!