shopping safari

Ornaments for your next Mermen themed Christmas  (@ French quarter)

The official American ™ dolphin t-shirt.....for when you need to take a stand against the  illegal dolphin immigration that's ruining this great country of ours! (@ Walmart)

Obesity Tea for when you need to  diarrhea  diet (@ Latin Market)

Literature...for when you want to learn to be gay  (@ the homosexual aisle of Dollar Tree)

The pocket hose, for when you want a hose...in your pocket (@  Target)

Jane Russell cd for when you want to be "pampered" (@ the adult diaper section of Big Lots)

It happens.

and now a word from our sponsor....

 

via

thought for the day

House Hunters, Accidental

Yesterday, on a routine trip to Target, I got trapped by a Mardi gras parade.

They spring up around this time of the year when you least suspect them...and then
you find yourself trapped in traffic for hours.
Anyway, on my circuitous route out, I found myself deep in subdivisions I've never traveled. Spooky.

So, to keep myself occupied...I took some (bad) flip phone photo:

First up is this (now sadly rundown) beauty from the 70s.  Soaring vaulted ceilings, clad in weathered cypress.

The most amazing thing...the thing that made me literally turn the car around and take this photo, however....were the three story high full length vintage macrame drapes.  Macrame, people! Amazing.

Less showy was this (rather run down)  beauty from the early sixties. It looked like a plane ready to take off.

Also looking like it's just about to take off is this house.  Their car will NOT flood again, dammit.

Meanwhile, in a VERY different subdivision, a little bit of Jamaica 

a few of my new years resolutions

 diet

Be better groomed

Take up a new hobby.

Meet new people

shopping safari (ugly furniture edition)

First off, we need a few chairs.
Hmmm...let's see, which will it be?

1.the extra tall goth faux snakeskin?

2.or maybe the  hot pink latex set?

3. Or maybe the "Yes We Can" Sit on Obama's face /Homage to Democracy?


 Now for a sofa. Which should it be?

4. The faux leather "Tuscan" style with "brocade" accents?

5. or the brown polyester velvet behemoth with extra pillows?

 Lastly, no room is complete without a bit of art over the sofa:

6. "Old Woman Battling Giant Rabbit for Carrot"

7. or 'Adam and Eve in 'Avatar on Ice'"?

thought for the day

via tim

And the answer to...

who is our favorite financial advisor/born again football father is
none other than "John Pruitt".
 
Oh, what?

You mean you weren't obsessively scouring the internet for porn in the early 2000s, waiting ever so patiently for your dial up modem to download the image, centimeter by painful centimeter....
only to stop just before the goods?  
(Much just like I've had to criminally crop that last photo?)

Well I guess then you had a life.
Lucky you.
This is for the rest of us then:

uh...really?