Nov 11, 2010

man meme


So it seems hayward tagged me in a "Man Meme"

It asks "what are the ingredients for the secret recipe for my perfect man"?
At first I was excited by this idea.... but upon recollection, I realized just what a snore this list would actually be.
So, um...sorry about that.
But anyway, here it is:

1. He has to laugh at (at least some of ) my stupid
jokes...and at himself. I'll gladly laugh at his and myself.

2. I'm a sucker for talent. It's one of those things that automatically
makes me interested in even someone kind of homely: the ability to write
(!), or act, or paint, or sing, or cook, or well, never mind.
Talent is always attractive.

3. I'm a sucker for a nice voice too, but who isn't?

4. He should be genuinely interested in my life...at least some of the
time. Lord knows, I'd reciprocate. Hell, I've reciprocated even when he hasn't.

5. As for looks, well, my tastes run the entire
gamut. I mean really. I've found myself attracted to just about every
type
... every single age, race, height, weight and coloring
you can imagine. I mean really...I'm pretty much a whore A celibate whore, but
still.

But I guess if someone put a gun to my head and made me narrow down
one type, I'd say I tend to favor men who are tallish, slender, hirsute, and
dark haired. Oh, with good teeth. I kind of have a fetish for good teeth.
And noses.

6.Lastly, he should want to be with me. This is, of course, the most important (and most elusive, alas) of all these qualities. It trumps them all, I'm sure.


Are you still awake? I didn't think so.

Anyway, who knows, maybe he's out there somewhere, right?
Actually, he probably is. No doubt right now somewhere he's petting his Irish setter, drinking cognac, listening to the rain, sensitively reading Shelley by firelight...while his bitch of a husband is grudgingly scrubbing skid marks out of his dirty drawers.

As for "tagging", I tag you, gentle readers.

How would you build your own "perfect" man?

8 comments:

govtdrone said...

My favorite man consists of a mix of Keanu Reeves and Jon Hamm. Yeah.

Anonymous said...

That's an interesting question, because the answer shifts with age.

Years ago I would have put "funny" and "intelligent" at the top of the list. Now they would be in the top 10, but I'd be more concerned with: a sense of empathy, a non-addictive personality, and a well-integrated life (family, friends, job, community, relationship).

If that's too much to ask, I'll take a Jon Hamm lookalike who sucks like a Hoover.

Michael Guy said...

The term 'perfect man' seems somewhat like an oxymoron.

I like the 'bad boy' types; tall, dark, brooding with a bad-ass sense of humor. Stubble is good. And someone who respects their family ties, is emotionally grounded, respectful and most of all: trustworthy. Not a player. Actor Seann William Scott (Steve Stiffler/American Pie) sorta floats my boat...

Who am I kidding? Basically anyone who will put up with my shit and baggage.

hayward said...

Regarding item 2, stay away from dancers. I'm not referring to the type that dances on bars but that should probably apply also.

MJ said...

Did someone mention John Hamm?

Hello Don Draper!

Miss Janey said...

What? A big wiener doesn't even rank anymore???

Salty Miss Jill said...

Someone who looks like Jemaine Clement and knows his place.

Jim said...

I've always said, there is no one more attractive, than a person who thinks I'm attractive.