Feb 13, 2011

in olden days, a glimpse of stocking...

"Do not touch my hair."
"Do you feel anything yet?"


" I love you, Jim, but those pleated pants are so 1959. Take them off. Now."


"Don't ask don't tell, my ass. Ha."


"by which we mean 'Fabulous'"

" I'm Lillian Russell." "No, I'm Lillian Russell, bitch."



via

Feb 11, 2011

Ten things I'm wondering right now


1. Why "Tonya Harding" is a top "trending now" topic according to Yahoo.
In February.
Of 2011.

2. Why did I buy six pink valentine cupcakes for myself?

3. Why every time the administration fucks up, we're called in to be given a stern lecturing to. It's kind of like a parent gambling all of his daughter's savings away only to tell her:
"Now listen here, Sally, you just have to be more responsible with your money or else!"
grrrr

4. How the black dress shoes I bought to replace the last pair, which were too unfashionable to wear anymore, have already gone out of style, without my having ever worn them.

5. Why people answer the phone when they clearly don't have time to talk.

6. Why the one bathroom, one, at work either has a working toilet or is unlocked, but never at the same time.

7. How to get that half a bottle of spilled cumin that fell behind the stove, so the kitchen doesn't smell like a cheap Indian buffet anymore.

8. Why that nice lady crack whore on Tulane last night was wearing black crocs and a blonde weave. All that plastic, but none of it where it could have helped.

9. Where those six valentines day cupcakes went.

10. Who keeps visiting here from:
"Holy See (Vatican City State) arrived from waynes-nude-musicians.blogspot.com on "night is half gone...".

Feb 3, 2011

thought for the day


via

Tết offensive



The other day my Vietnamese hairdresser/friend told me that tomorrow is the new year:
"We call it 'year of the cat'. Chinese, they call it year of rabbit."
Me too. I hate cat."



"Really?" I say. "I'm a leo. I think I am a cat."
"I know," she smiles and continues fucking up my hair.

Feb 1, 2011

completely gratuitious

a.
b.
c.
d.
e.
f.

One of these men, I actually managed to touch with my own two hands
Who is it?

(yeah, I know I know, too easy. But then so am I )

thought for the day